D for dislike

Dislike is too meek a word. More like abhor. Things are better now, less cursing, less outbursts. But paradoxically the resentment inside seems to be festering. It has gotten to the point where the very sight of her causes my heartbeat to rise (not in a good way), and I let myself get upset by the way she washes, washes, washes... constantly washing her hands, repeatedly washing her cup and spoon. Leaves the tap on running while she struggles to dig out that morsel of food stuck in between her teeth. I feel the disgust welling up, at EVERY thing she does. The way she tries to give her acute analysis of why someone isn't home yet ("Raining lah. No umbrella. You never go and pick him/her??") Indeed the very sound of her voice irritates me. I feel that I am rearing her as if she is a domesticated animal. Provide the food, water, shelter, medicine but nothing more and in return there is also no "useful product" obtained from this creature. I feel bad occasionally. I feel angry at myself for letting her affect my physiology this much. Why do I abhor her this much? It is not because of the illness per se. It appears to be because she used to behave in such a high-and-mighty manner, like an empress, that I am seeking revenge in my own way. She has never given us a hug. Never played with us. Never said the love word. Her scheming, toxic nature remains intact in spite of her dementia. She does not want to leave food for the helper. She dashes out of her room to make her nth cup of coffee when no one is around. 

I google search to see if it's normal to feel this strong dislike for one's mother. I'm not alone.